mintcar

Things are never what you expect. And there are times when doubt builds up so much in your system, there's no way to reconcile it (or bury it, or try to reason it out of being) ... except to, possibly, escape it. There is so much up and down--maybe too much instability that it's not worth it anymore. I'm in a place where I could be anywhere and yet, why do I limit myself mentally? I create these walls that absolutely do not exist (or could very easily be broken by my own strength of will). Why regret? And why feel like I am always being cheated? I don't need this. My intuition speaks for itself; it's not perfect logic, but it shouts very loudly. My 'tattered spirit' needs no soothing if there is no possibility of destruction. I don't need to feel good about myself and know that there's always a shoulder to lean on (I can lean on myself); all I need to know that it was worth all my time, my emotional energy, and I need to know that I can trust you.

I simply want peace of mind; I don't have enough minutes to dwell on these insecurities that I come face to face with everyday. I don't care to argue about shit that's trivial, and I shouldn't tolerate it any longer.

By the way: I felt good about the arch 100b midreview. I'm happy with my new design for the CIL, although I think there are many decisions left to make. Good job to all who slept not this weekend! We made it.